From Darkness to Light: Finding Your Path

As Autumn's chill fills the air and Winter fast approaches, it's only natural that our thoughts turn to darkness.  The days are getting shorter.  It's usually dark when we leave for work in the morning and dark soon after we get home.  We're heading into the time of the year when we want to snuggle into our warm homes and hibernate.

With so little precious daylight, it's easy to feel sad and negative.  We depend a great deal on the sun to elevate our mood and when the days are dark and dreary, our mood can take a nosedive.  How can we find comfort and strength in these dark days?  Consider these ideas:

• Rethink News!  Break the news habit.  Don't read the newspaper or watch the news each day.  This may be a hard habit to break but think of all the negative messages you are getting daily.  How often do you actually see or read a positive story?  Trust that if there is an issue that you need to know about, it will come to you without you having to be bombarded with the thousands of other negative messages.
  
  
• Get Inspired!  With the extra time you are going to have from not reading or watching the news, read or listen to inspirational books and tapes.  It's much easier to keep a positive frame of mind when you are absorbing positive messages.  There are wonderful resources you can find in bookstores and libraries that will help you learn and grow.  You don't have to be stuck in the darkness and fear.
  
  
• Start Journaling!  While you are doing all this learning and growing, consider starting a journal.  Write down what you're feeling and experiencing as you grow and change.  Not only will this help to clarify what is happening to you, but it will also serve as a record of how far your journey has taken you.  You don't have to share the journal if you don't want to but having some place safe where you can express your truest feelings and emotions can be very cathartic.
  
  
• HALT!  Check in with yourself and make sure you are not too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired.  If you are hungry, then eat something you enjoy that is nutritious.  For anger, take deep breaths and remind yourself that your anger will not get you anywhere.  Don't repress your anger, though.  Release it in healthy ways like screaming into a pillow or venting to a friend.  If you are lonely, call or make a date with a new acquaintance or friend.  Recognize when you are tired and get some sleep!
  
  
• Start a Self-care Routine!  While you are taking care of your inner being by journaling, learning, and growing, remember to take care of your outer being.  Take extreme self care.  It's important to treat yourself to the simple pleasures in life on a regular basis, like a warm bubble bath, a cup of soothing tea, lighting a fragrant candle, getting a massage, or getting a manicure/pedicure.  If you don't treat yourself as the special person you are, you soon won't have energy for anyone else.
  
  
• Boost Your Energy!  One wonderful way to share your extra energy is by volunteering.  Share some time with a child or elderly person.  Spend time caring for animals.  Donate time to a cause that means something special for you.  It doesn't matter what you do as long as you do it.  Kindness towards others goes a long way to staving off the darkness.  It makes you feel good to be making a contribution to another human being and your community.
  
  
• Celebrate Your Friends!  While you are donating your time to a cause you believe in, remember to give time to those who believe in you - your friends.  They are the ones who know you best, warts and all, and still love you anyway.  Friends are the ones who will lend an ear to listen to your troubles, laugh with you when you are happy, and cry with you when you are sad.  They are also the ones who will give you a swift kick in the pants when you need it.  But don't blame them for it - they only do it because they love you!
  
  
• List Your Gratitudes!  While you are thinking about your wonderful friends, write a gratitude list and feel the abundance in your life.  We all have things in life that we are grateful for like a loving partner, wonderful kids, adorable pets, nurturing friends, a roof over our heads, and jobs to pay the bills.  Make your list of gratitudes and keep adding to it.  Read it over frequently and feel the energy that it gives you.  You do have a lot to be grateful for.  Concentrate on this list rather than on the troubles you are having.
  
  
• Dump and Flip Your Thinking!  One great way to boost your energy and positive feelings is with a Dump and Flip exercise, an excellent tool for gaining perspective on an issue.  You take a piece of paper and fold it in half lengthwise.  On the left-hand side you dump everything that is bothering you.  On the right-hand side you flip it 180 degrees to make a positive statement.  For example, if you feel sad that the days are getting shorter you would put it on the left-hand side.  On the right-hand side you could put, "I am able to spend more time with my family because we are all at home" or "Christmas is coming soon and there are lots of fun activities to do."  By focusing on the positive, you are much more likely to bring more of it into your life.
  
  
• Keep the Faith!  Speaking of the positive, faith will help to dispel the darkness too.  If you follow the teachings of a specific set of principles, religion, or spiritual belief system, you will surely hear lots of messages about goodness and light.  Belonging to a community of like-minded people is incredibly heartwarming, affirming, and validating.  If you seek to find such a community and haven't yet, keep searching.  There is one out there for you and you will know it when you find it.
  
  
• If these ideas haven't increased the light for you, you might consider getting professional help.  A trained counsellor or medical professional would be able to help you discover the cause of your darkness and find tools to help you with it.  You deserve to have a world filled with lightness and happiness!

There is always going to be both light and dark.  It's the cyclical nature of the seasons.  We know that there has to be a period of darkness in Winter so that the earth can renew itself in the Spring.  You can choose to mope through the Winter and count the days until it is Spring again or you can choose to revel in the beauty of Winter, take pleasure in the light you do have, and bask in the warm glow of time with friends and family.  Your choice.  I hope you  choose the latter.  You are worth it!

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